I dont know what to write about.

I mean.. nothing has happened lately, apart from the unfortunate English assignment where I have to write a Austen-esque type letter
Spent the day at home because was feeling very weak and couldn't get out of bed. Those stupid boils hurt so much... Watched some Justice League, and then just laid around and slept. I might try to get some work done eventually but I think a cuppa tea is called for first. mmm cuppa :)
So Salmon and Jamesa showed up at my door around half past four. Was kinda strange. Mainly because I was lying around, looked out of my brothers window, and there they were. Being creepy. They came in for a while, watched some tv, called a random, then left around 5. Aimless children. They filled me in about the day at school, and how it was "quiet without me". Thanks for saying that I'm loud guys. :P
So apart from the usual, there really isn't much to say. I'm going to listen to the Beatles and chill out over a cuppa. Now for awesome yellow submarine type awesomeness, as seen below. :)

Nose strips ahoy!

You know those nose strips that tear out your blackheads? I have one on. They always make me feel like a girly girl. Im not a very good girl, in general, so this always feels strange. I have to do this though, if i want to pierce my nose. dude, its going to be so damn hardcore.
So lame day, overall. Sure, good things happened and stuff, like how i finally finished my book (apart from the actual putting it together) and how i finally have a plan for my life almost, but.. im just sad. im sad. and i feel so alone. and. im so fucking sick of crying.
So, im not feeling too great, and i guess i havent for a while. Im aware of my strange state. Im not happy about how im feeling, but im feeling that way so there.

dark moods.

Paddling paddling

I did some of that this arvo. Like.. an hour ago i was only just back on dry land. was freaking awesome. my shoulders hurt like a mofo, but yea. Now my mood is spoilt :(
My mam is sick and at home. now shes complaining about teh rubbish bin, and how im useless and how shes sick and yadda yadda and im just... tired. Im still nauseous and ive have sore shoulders from paddling and all i want to do is cry is cry in the corner because im so tired..

Im going to Nadi!

So yeah, I'm going to pretend to be a tourist this weekend. Im going to catch the tourist bus to Nadi town and walk around town until I find a taxi thatll take me to Denarau. I hope i dont get ripped off. sadly, i dont have a local uniform, but i guess, i'll live.

So this week wasnt too great. first of all, the stupid goldfish is stupid. im trying to sort out this thing, because i have to see him for the rest of the school year, so i want to be able to sit next to him without him getting up and moving across the room. its annoying, and not to mention hurtful. yes, hopefully i will get to relax this weekend and not get bothered by this whole.. thing.

Did i mention that im sick of being single? its not really my fault, i mean.. me being single. I dont know that many people that i can talk to, and is it wrong to think that having the ability to talk to someone in a relationship is important? so call me picky, idk.. i just dont think i want to have someone just to have someone... ugh. i hate being a teenager. no one is smart at my age.

So.. i ashamed.. im eating starburst sweets, that i bought despite being both sick and broke. i need comfort, so sue me.

lookit! giant kwoot ewok!

Its only Tuesday?

so yes.. it is. and it isnt even the end of tuesday, in fact i havent even gotten to sunset yet and im already tired. i think i might take a nurofen and have a nap. today was kind of okay. i mean, its not the everyday kind of day, and was slow and i spent most of the day falling asleep. myea... apart from art class. i loved art class. ive finished painting all of book 1 of 4 :)

weekend.

A new week, more terrifying experiences to be had. i have a problem. im sick of lack of emotional support. i hate how my best friend is usually out of town, and that the rest of my friends are too... different. i cant talk to them about some of the stuff i put in my blog, let alone about things i dont put here. i hate not being able to be close to someone.. but i know that its my fault. im just... a little bit lost.

on the bright side, i get to make a cover for friends cd type thing.. i think that what it is. or it just him asking for a portrait. either way, im glad to do it.

Werkiewerk!

So yes... its been a strange week. Seeing as Ma was out of town, the house was in a mess and i had no one to cook for. Sure, Albie is around, but he doesnt seem to eat much. And.. for me there is always maggi. Thats a type of noodle, by the by, just in case you live in a hole in the ground and pay no attention to much in general. So emo level has been up and down. mostly up. which is bad. but my friend ryssa is in town and we hung out last night, and that was fun. so am at work at the moment, waiting for a segment to be over.. there isnt much to do when an uber long program is playing. so i was making some coffee.. and now am just sitting around. i have the four hour shift to myself. its a nice change. i also have to work on my plan for the program i have to eventually write. i also have a giant pile of assesments to get through this weekend, not to mention the studying i have to do and the welcome home/birthday dinner for my Ma. i dont have a problem with any of these things... I just wish i didnt have to deal with anything though... im even considering being lame next year and just going to USP... to do something boring and possibly simple.
So i went out last night, to Bad Dog to celebrate the coming of age of a friend which involved fancy pizza.. it was ok. then went to ryssas house and just talked for ages, about random stuff... and after a cuppa here and a cuppa there, of coffee, i was home. so yea... was relatively uneventful but very relaxing... and after astressful week of the sick brother, feeling sad and missing my ma, it was nice. and nice is always good. :)