Theres something terrifying about knowing that things will change.
The other week, i got told that too much progesterone is throwing off my general "me-ness" and whatnot. i went in for nausea and came out knowing that I had to change so much to deal with what was making me miss so much.
nausea sucks dick for money. i hate it. i had accepted it, gone "oh yeah, thats just how my body reacts to everything". turns out theres something to do with salt and other stuff so the first thing to be cut back is my consumption of the amazing dirty chinese food.
to my knowledge, im the only one that uses the term with the prefix dirty. overseas, chinese food is weird. its clean. theres so little msg, so much random other crap. its not the chinese that im used to. not fiji chinese food.
so. thats gone and cut back to whenever. and because of cutting back my brain frizzes out. all of last week i was angry. angry at everything. i guess the hormones are like "hmm... shes changing her game... mess with her mind! bwahaha". and when i wasnt angry i was flipping between sad and amazingly high on life.
it was terrible.
yeah, sure, possible manic depression there with my brain all over the place. and what do i do? i call people. talk about everything else. distract myself from the fact that im getting upset or angry or sad about something that i know doesnt make sense but bothers me all the same.
its tiring.
i dont want to have to go through with this anymore.
so, what do i do? look it up. exercise apparently. eating better. the latter is never a problem, food is totes my thing. but the exercise... negh.
its still adjusting, im still adjusting. its barely been two weeks of trying to eat right, make sure i doan sit all day, etc etc. i just hope this is worth it.
stupid science.
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